Help Perseus move from sexually & emotionally abusive home

For: Perseus
Organizer: Perseus Lovelle
Help Perseus move from sexually & emotionally abusive home (Perseus)
of $4,000 goal
76% Complete
Raised by 71 donors

The Story

My name is Perseus, & I'm a 23 year old mentally & physically disabled transgender person. I've lived w/ severe abuse for most of my life, & up until recently I was coping through it. My mother & I lived with my stepfather who abused us both in every form until I was 17 & called child services, got my sister adopted into another family. Recently, I began trauma therapy, & since I have started recovering repressed memories of the abuse I have endured. One of these was when I was 15, my mother bought a boyfriend & I drugs & when we were high, coerced us into having sex in front of her & masturbated to it. Earlier today I tried to address this in a fight & she blamed me, saying I should've said no, & that because she has Bipolar disorder, it excuses it. I believe there are more repressed memories I have not recovered & I have no idea how to cope with this one alone. Besides this, my grandfather who I also live w/ is emotionally abusive & can become physical at any moment & has tried before. He has a history of hitting my mother & as he becomes more unstable due to dementia, I fear it is only a matter of time before things escalate. I've been threatened that if I defend myself if he attacks me, he'll charge me for assault of the elderly. As I'm writing this, my mom is trying to get into my door & threatening me that if I go to the ER to get mental health help, she'll lock me out. I don't have a set of keys & have nowhere to go; my parents threaten eviction often, over trivial things such as eating a slice of bread that I didn't buy... The only shelter close only take families, leaving me with not much choice but to apply for Section 8 housing & finding somewhere to live in the meantime, or a shelter farther away. Because of the abuse, I have severe PTSD & Dissociative Identity Disorder & what is called Hashimoto's Disease, an autoimmune disorder where your immune system targets your thyroid, and is exacerbated by stress. It causes Hypothyroidism, which I'm now on medication for life for. In 2014, I quit working after urged by my endocrinologist that the stress was too much on my body. I'm currently in the process of getting Disability Social Security but the process takes a while & I'm in a race for time before ending up homeless. Due to dissociation, I can't drive, I don't even have a permit. Wherever I'd be moving, transportation would be needed. In MA, most places for rent around is 700$ + a month, nevermind a phone bill, transpo & other expenses. I'm awaiting emergency benefits from the state, & it is unknown when I can get them. Even still, that's 303$ a month, not enough for a weeks hotel stay. It's going to take me quite a bit to stay somewhere safe that is more permanent; I'll keep checking into shelters, but I'm afraid even then only so much is available... I'm not sure as much will be needed to be stable & safe, so I'm setting the limit at 3000$ as a starting point but depending on how long it can take for help from the state, I'll prob need more. On twitter there is documentation of these things as they have happened, including msgs of my mother admitting to the sexual abuse, then blaming me & two years worth of documentation of my struggle with my family. I can no longer fake being ok, or hide my upset at the pain & suffering their abuse is causing... My mother said I would have a place while trying to get disability, but recently said she believes when I turned 18 she shouldn't have had to care for me anymore, & will gladly "dump me out on the streets," for I'm "too much to handle." She told me since I was 8, I've been nothing but trouble & wants to be rid of me. I'm scared I'll never have a place to recover from the abuse. If you can, please help me get somewhere safe, & know I am so grateful, & if you can't, for helping spread the message. Thank you so much.

Fundraiser Updates

Posted on January 11, 2018

Posted on January 11, 2018

I have raised the goal to 4000 because although we reached our goal, (Seriously, what the heck, thank you all!) if people still want to donate, I could still use the money. Right now I am being supported by a friend with a home, but we are still struggling to support both of us right now as I am still not on emergency funds. My worker fails to call me back, and even talking to her supervisor, she rarely returns my calls or her voicemail is full. My disability determination should be coming back any time now, and if it is denied, I have to appeal and it could take another year or two to even get on social security. In the last six months, I have been diagnosed with a condition called CSS, Central Sensitization Syndrome, where your body processes pain incorrectly. Things that should not hurt, like certain fabrics or temperatures, do hurt. I'm starting Physical and Hydrotherapy to help with all my physical issues, and several new medications, all of which should help with this determination.

Thank you again to anyone who decides to continue to help me.

Posted on January 11, 2018

Posted on January 11, 2018

It has been a long while since I posted an update for this fundraiser, and I have had many things happen since I originally posted it. After going homeless, I ended up with a stranger who agreed to help me out of the kindness of his heart, but actually this person was only seemingly doing it for the personal satisfaction of helping me. Soon after, he became mean and eventually even refused to talk to me after realizing the realistic cost of taking someone in and paying for the utilities they would cause. Even as I rationed showers and electricity or what I absolutely needed, he would turn the wifi off every day just to spite me. It was a nasty situation in which the next 5 months of my life followed until he decided my disability taking too long to come wasn't fast enough for him and kicked me back onto the street without much notice, something that was apparently legal because we didn't have a contract. Luckily, a friend of mine, unable to see me living this way anymore, took me in. He had to uproot his entire life, moving from his own home so that he could have another person on the lease.

Since, I am living in a non-abusive household for the first time, and am getting my health on track. My mother still stalks me online, but I no longer have contact with any of my family; I have changed numbers and everything I could so that I could not be found. All types of changes are happening with me now as I start to unpack and process everything I have been through. Memories are coming to the surface that I had long repressed. Still, life is better now than it ever has been, and this place will, all things going right anyway, hopefully shelter me for a few years as I try and pick up the pieces.

Your generous and incredible donations are what has gotten me through this year. Here in New England, it has been as much as -10 at night, and with many snowstorms already. With my physical illnesses and lack of resources, I probably would not have survived this winter. Your donations paid for the first and last deposit on my shared apartment my roommate could not afford, gave me personal care items I needed, paid for medications, and gas to be transported places I needed to go. I cannot thank you enough. A

When I started this fundraiser, I genuinely thought no one would care about me or my situation. When I was searching for shelters, I got refused women's shelters because while legally a woman, I look like a man, and I cannot go in men's shelters because of my sexual trauma and the fact I am legally still female. LGBT Specific ones mainly only took LGBT Youth, which I am just over the cut for. It felt like the world had no place for me, and would rather leave me to die. This could have impacted my mental health deeply if I had not had a big reminder that there were strangers I did not know ready to sacrifice so I could survive. Things are still hard. I am having to jump through many government hoops even now as we speak to get emergency funding. But things are looking up. Maybe not permanently, but for right now, and that alone I am grateful for.

You all may as well have saved my life.

Thank you.

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