Posted on September 23, 2017
After Jill's surgery, surviving the hurricane and getting home from Houston, we had a couple weeks of uninterrupted life.
Then, 3 weeks to the day after her surgery, Jill woke up around midnight with blood gushing out of her mouth (and I'm not being dramatic - legitimately gushing). After realizing what was happening and trying to put as much pressure in her mouth as possible, we jumped in the car and headed to Denver Health, the nearest hospital).
Over the next week, this would happen 3 more times - Jill waking up in the middle of the night with "spontaneous arterial bleeding" from the wound in her mouth, and each time got worse. Those bleeds ending up requiring a total of 3 trips to the ER, 5 nights in the hospital, another surgery, a blood transfusion, a ventilator, and a lot more stitches. We have used our collective weight in gauze and Surgicel (magic gauze-like paper that helps clotting), have ended the useful life of several bath towels (RIP soft gray towels), and cleaned more blood out of fingernails and crevices than I ever knew was possible.
Jill got released from the ICU yesterday and is still wiped out. We are hoping and praying to all things good in the universe that these stitches hold, that the lingual artery is done playing games with us, and that ultimately there is no more bleeding. This healing will of course delay the next rounds of chemo, but we're not sure by how much yet.
The last week was shitty, but it was made so much easier to bear because of our close circle of friends who didn't let us go 5 minutes without doing something to help.
I just don't know how to say "thank you" to you guys. Every time it comes out or the words form, they seem so incredibly inadequate.
But, I will do it anyway because those are the only ones I know to use: Thank You. For bringing coffee and food, for taking our dogs out, for reading to Jill, for sitting quietly, for making Jill laugh, for holding her hand, for holding mine, for being bodyguards and chefs and advocates and caretakers, for making us feel so loved and supported just by being there. (Special shout out to Shaina, who has now, among other things, cleaned up something resembling a murder scene THREE TIMES over the last week, and our hospital crew - V, Monica, Jamie, Hannah, Wilson, Kitt. I don't always feel worthy of your friendships, but I am so grateful for them.) And, thanks also to everyone else for all the messages, offers to help, and love you sent our way.
Now, we sleep.